Perspective...

God will never put you through anything you can't handle.

Note to self: If you break, God will fix you, so He isn't worried about it like you are.

God offers me the opportunity to develop the trust. I decide whether or not I accept the opportunity.

Sharing interesting posts...

I always enjoys post by Kris Tualla. Of course, I love her books, too.
http://romancingthegenres.blogspot.com/2012/10/the-mystery-is-when-did-i-start-writing.html

Writers in the Storm shared a great post on physical therapy for writers:
http://writersinthestorm.wordpress.com/2012/10/10/physical-therapy-for-your-writing/

Vijaya Schartz gives a bit of a history and geography lesson:
http://medievalnovels.blogspot.com/2012/10/where-heck-is-luxembourg-by-vijaya.html

Patty Froese always has interesting posts. This one is on writing love scenes. (It's safe.)
http://pattyfroese.com/?p=3665

Stephanie Burkhart went to the avocado festival. Yes, I'm green with envy. :-)
http://sgcardin.blogspot.com/2012/10/hanging-with-avocados-boys.html

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Wordless

Blogs worth reading this week...

I enjoyed them anyway. :-)

A.R. Norris, the Telomere Trilogy (book 3 is available this month WHOOHOO!), anyway, she had a post about marketing. I could definitely relate. I found the comments helpful.
http://sci-fiadventures.blogspot.com/2012/09/the-daunting-abyss-of-marketing-and.html

AR also had an earlier blog on space travel. I thought it was cool.
http://sci-fiadventures.blogspot.com/2012/09/space-travel-gazing-shore-beyond-horizon.html

Danielle Thorne talks about apples. Yummy!
http://thebalancedwriter.blogspot.com/2012/10/how-about-them-apples.html

June Foster shares a bit of her writing journey and a contest. I love June's books. Very sweet, Christian romance.
http://pewperspective.blogspot.com/2012/10/guest-blog-june-foster-author-of-as-we.html

Patty Froese, another of my favorite writers, shared several good posts this week.
http://pattyfroese.com/

Tina Pinson shared an interesting post on the importance of voting. Worth the read.
http://tinapinson.blogspot.com/2012/10/elections-are-coming.html

I love book trailers:

Nurtured in Purple by Jude Urbanski:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LrSMr9ACaW0

The Return of Joy by Lynette Endicott
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FrTCrfJRaIg&feature=g-upl

Baer Necessities by Linda McMaken
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-BuDECZsZrg

and Baer Truth by Linda McMaken
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MaA8p65oOeo

Do those look fun or what? I really need more time for reading.

The Cookie Jar...

Abuse running in families is considered common knowledge. There are always exceptions to the rule. Perhaps to put it more diplomatically: It is not uncommon for abuse to be passed down from one generation to the next. Such an argument is frequently employed in court cases. I remember a PSA (Public Service Announcement) showing a little boy who is aged from small child to adulthood. The sound in the background is his father scream and threatening at his mother. The frames show the boy first horrified, then cringing, then embarrassed, mocking, and then screaming and threatening his own wife. The cycle continues until someone decides to break the chain of abuse. A chain breaker.

A chain breaker understands they need help out of the cookie jar and actively seek it.

Years ago, my sister and I discovered a card at DaySpring. Unfortunately, it was an ecard and, as far as I know, no longer exists, except in our memories. We refer to it often, to this day.

Frame One: A lovely, sunny kitchen, with a cookie jar on the counter.

Frame Two: Two gingerbread girls are in the cookie jar gazing up at the opening they can't reach on their own.

Frame Three: One gingerbread girl pushes the other gingerbread girl out of the jar.

Frame Four: The gingerbread girl who is out of the jar reaches down and pulls out the other gingerbread girl.

Frame Five: The two gingerbread girls toddle off into the sunset with big smiles on their faces.

Since I first saw the card, I've come to realize I haven't escaped the jar, yet. I still slide back. I may not escape in this life, but I keep trying. The old habits still pop up too easily, but I am doing better.

God blesses me with other survivors who aid me in my efforts to escape. I also do my best to help as many as possible, no matter how many times someone falls.

Thank you to all the amazing people who share the struggle, without recriminations. I would not be where I am, peeking over the edge of the jar, without your encouragement, understanding, patience, and love. I thank God every day for you.

Something to cheer me...

This is a link to one of the movie trailers to The Hobbit movie.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nOGsB9dORBg&feature=fvwp

http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/the-hobbit-an-unexpected-journey/trailers/the-hobbit-an-unexpected-journey-theatrical-trailer-30640778-30640778.html

Tolkien is an amazing storyteller. When I first started writing again, I aspired to be like Tolkien. If I could write even a fraction as well, I thought it would be quite an accomplishment.

So if you wonder about my style, now you know from whence came my first inspiration.

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Great blog on dialogue format...

Posting the link here, so it's easy for me to find. :-)

http://www.anovelwritingsite.com/2012/09/writing-dialogue/

Helpful computer...or not...

Blogger is "improving" which means making it easier for some and more difficult for others.

My blog roll is weirding out on me.

However, other parts seem to be okay, for now.

I'll settle back into a routine, soon. Promise. :-)

Editing note to self...

Lord of the Rings soundtrack : Editing music

Always

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Editing...

I'll be back when it's over.

Miss B...

5-Star Reviews at Amazon for A Promise of Possibilities...

A writer hopes their book will be received well. To have someone like your work well enough to praise to the whole world is gratifying. *happy hobbit dance and squeee!*

http://www.amazon.com/review/R22TMMAY26JE7R/ref=cm_cr_dp_title?ie=UTF8&ASIN=B00909PNB8&channel=detail-glance&nodeID=133140011&store=digital-text

http://www.amazon.com/review/R386IIS6XV3Q5J/ref=cm_cr_dp_title?ie=UTF8&ASIN=B00909PNB8&channel=detail-glance&nodeID=133140011&store=digital-text

http://www.amazon.com/review/R1YVKUDXSG7I6U/ref=cm_cr_dp_title?ie=UTF8&ASIN=B00909PNB8&channel=detail-glance&nodeID=133140011&store=digital-text

Great writing tool blog...

Over at Writers in the Storm, Sharla Rae shares an great post

http://writersinthestorm.wordpress.com/2012/09/12/words-for-your-writing-toolbox-get-rid-of-get/

Posting here, so it's easier for me to find again.

Kris Tualla post...

I've been meaning to share this for two weeks. Not waiting another day.

Kris Tualla shares her deaf hero over at Romancing the Genres. I finished the book this past weekend and loved it.
http://romancingthegenres.blogspot.com/2012/08/the-unique-strength-of-damaged-heroes.html

Revealing a writer's secret...

Patty Froese, writer of Perfect on Paper, blogged about Dangerous Friends.
http://pattyfroese.com/?p=3629

People worry about knowing a writer because they may find themselves in the book. I don't know about all writers but the writers I know composite their characters. A person may inspire, but the writer takes the spark of inspiration and evolves it into their own creation.This is true of everything in a writer's life. Anything is subject to ending up in a story.

For example, in my upcoming release, Luck in Love, the hero is a photographer. He creates a triptych, so I had to create a triptych. I'm not a photographer. My sister is. I envisioned the three pictures and asked my sister if it was possible. Sure! Photochop! Ummm...this is 1973 and 1983. Oh. Okay, this is what you can and can't do. And so I created the triptych around those parameters.

Now, for the secret.

For those who worry about knowing a writer and having your secrets revealed know this: A writer reveals far more about themselves than they will ever reveal about you.

I leave you to mull over that bit of information. ;-D

11 years later...

Eleven years ago, yesterday, the world changed...

I promised myself I would change.

I did.

I discovered my emotions and made friends with them.

I discovered the community of Lord of the Rings fans.

I discovered amazing new friends.

I discovered writing.

I discovered how difficult it was to stop lying, especially to myself.

What have I accomplished in 11 years?

God blessed me with guidance and gentle chastisement so I could recognize the lies in my life and stop lying.

God blessed me with amazing friends and a huge support system.

God blessed me with courage to pursue writing.

Peace with myself.

Abundant love.

Dreams realized.

Remember 9/11

Never forget.

Almost 3,000 souls were lost, between the World Trade Center, First Responders, Four Commercial Flights, the Pentagon, and a field in Pennsylvania.

I woke early, as I always did, so I could go out and take care of my horse, before picking up my work. Living on the opposite side of the country, it had already started, and I didn’t know. I groomed and grained my horse, like I did every single morning, for the previous four years. I was usually out there alone. Most of the other boarders came out in the evenings or on weekends. I enjoyed having the place to myself.

This morning, one of the other boarders arrived and asked if I’d heard about the plane flying into the World Trade Center. I thought she was joking, and in very poor taste. I didn’t believe her. It was absurd. Ridiculous. Impossible. Then the owner of the property came out, and told us that the Pentagon had also been hit. I stared first at one and then the other and back again, finally asking, “You mean it’s real?”

I started a prayer of pleading, in my heart, and didn’t stop.

After I finished taking care of my horse, I slid into my car, still trying to wrap my mind around what I’d been told, and not entirely believing. Not yet. I rolled down the window. It was still warm in the mornings, promising more heat later in the day. I turned on the radio. The station played the same thing, over and over. Two planes had flown into the Twin Towers, and one into the Pentagon, and possibly yet another. As I drove to pick up my work, other cars passing me, going both ways, also had their windows rolled down, an unheard of occurrence since A/C was the preference. It was almost as if we were trying to connect to each other through the air. We all had our radios on, listening to the same thing. Total strangers, sharing the road in separate cars, all listening to the same thing, and we all knew it.

As I picked up my work, at two different locations, I kept hoping which airlines were involved would be mentioned. But they weren’t releasing any details of any kind. By the time I was on the last stretch home, I found myself screaming at the radio for the names of the airlines.

One of my friends is a pilot. The last time we’d talked, the month before, he’d told me that his route was in the northeast. How could I be sure he wasn’t involved? If he was safe? I was desperate to know which airlines were involved, and felt guilty for hoping my friend was safe.

When I arrived home I turned on the television. Still, no specifics of any kind were offered. The same thing repeated every five to ten minutes. I didn’t own a cellphone, yet. I called from the landline, expecting to reach his cellphone. He answered. I remained absolutely calm. We were really more acquaintances than friends, but I needed to know he was safe. I felt guilty for being relieved and grateful he was okay. His route had changed, that month. (I did finally learn his company wasn’t one of the ill-fated airlines.) He had been grounded, along with every other airplane, as he was preparing for departure. He didn’t feel like he could complain, since the city he was in was lovely. I’m still glad he was safe. A part of me still feels a little guilty.

Then it was reported that a plane had crashed into a field. While the media debated its significance, I knew. I didn’t need confirmation. I knew the passengers had done something. I knew, without doubt, that the passengers had made a decision and followed through on their choice. I wondered what I would have done in their place, and hoped I’d be as courageous.

Months later, our family learned that a cousin was scheduled to be at a meeting in the WTC that morning. He didn’t make it because he was taking his parents to the airport. So many lives were spared that day because of being late, taking a child to school, or some other small, seemingly inconsequential event.

So many lives were lost. They were on time, doing their jobs, being where they were supposed to be. Then the responders were there, doing their jobs. Many of them had been going off duty, but recognized an emergency and the need for more help. They were being who they are.

Fathers, mothers, grandmothers, grandfathers, sons, daughters, sisters, brothers, uncles, aunts, nieces, nephews, wives, husbands, coworkers, friends.

I changed. In a day.

All my life I had been punished for interrupting the news. I hated the news. I never watched it. On that day, I had the television on, all day. I only turned it off long enough to go to sleep, and then I was up watching it again. Even when I was working, it was on. My parents wouldn’t turn on the television. They didn’t want to hear anymore. I needed to know what was happening. I needed to feel connected to the rest of the world. I felt alone in the house, and a part of the whole world.

I changed.

I wanted to do something. Donate blood. I discovered I was no longer eligible. The day before, on September 10, a new ruling had passed. Because I had lived in England, for three months, I could never donate blood again. Then again, it wasn’t needed anyway.

That first day, I remember thinking that the hospitals would be inundated. But they weren’t. It was eerie. Waiting. Then the realization that either you made it relatively unscathed, or you didn’t. I didn’t know anyone, but I had friends who mourned the loss of many friends, friends who had called NYC home.

I would never be the same.

I hadn’t recognized the shock for what it was, until much later. I hadn’t realized how much the event changed me, yet.

A few months later, I saw Fellowship of the Ring. I discovered that 9/11 had entirely stripped away the protective wall I’d built around my feelings. I felt everything. The flood of emotions was overwhelming, confusing, frightening. I had moved from a world of muted grays to one of vibrant, flashing colors of every tint and hue.

I would never be the same.

I never suspected that my need to connect, on that day, would open a world I never imagined. I did connect. I connected with people through the internet, where I found an amazing and remarkable and vast circle of friends who shared my need to connect and share who we are. And we’ve been sharing the journey ever since. The circle has shifted, a little, expanding to include new friends, while others moved in their own direction, but always the rule has been the importance of discovering the connectedness we share through our experiences, regardless of where we live.

I still cry for those cruelly and needlessly lost. I still marvel at the miracles that occurred, and find myself in awe of all those strangers who helped strangers for the simple reason that they were good people, so it was the right thing to do. The heroics of those who died and those who lived to help others fills me with wonder at the strength and courage of the human spirit to rise above evil. Evil tried to strike a blow, but goodness and love and courage and strength and compassion shine brighter and clearer, burning away the darkness.

I will never forget.