The Project continues...

I'm prepping for a PRO-Class offered with Desert Rose, an RWA chapter. They're teaching web site building with WordPress. I've decided to create a site for The Project. If nothing else, it will be good practice, I hope. I've worked through several more chapters, today. I didn't finish it by the end of the month, but it will be done this weekend. At least, the latest re-write will be done. I'm trying to work out a title and pen name for it. For the record, I confess in the book and I'm willing to confess anywhere else that my weight problem is all in my head. I use my weight as a shield, my invisibility cloak, so to speak. I don't want to be noticed because being noticed isn't safe. If I'd been able to overcome that bone-deep need, I would have been great at acting. That being said, since I started writing The Project last summer, I've lost 15 lb.

More on The Project...

I've been fiddling with titles and pen names. I'm not much good for much else, at this point. That isn't entirely true. I've managed to work on three chapters, despite the stuffy head, headache, nausea, sore throat, cough, aches, chills, being tired... sounds awful, but I've felt worse, like yesterday. Sunday was awful. My voice is still not quite there. I also did some double checking on word usage in my WIP. On one of the blogs I follow, they talked about words being used in the wrong time period. I checked my own WIP and had to change quite a few. Thanks, Ruth, for that reminder to take a breather and not give up. It helped. Several of my friends have also been lifting me up, during this struggle. God is good.

A quote, sent by a friend...

“Writing a book is an adventure. To begin with, it is a toy and an amusement; then it becomes a mistress, and then it becomes a master, and then a tyrant. The last phase is that just as you are about to be reconciled to your servitude, you kill the monster, and fling him out to the public.” Winston Churchhill

Right now, I'm feeling like I'm dealing with monsters, and I'm thinking more along the lines of the dustbin rather than the public. It doesn't help that I'm feeling under the weather.

Must learn to stop fighting...

I've been struggling with chapter three of the current WIP. However, I've been busily doing another re-write of The Project. I've been berating myself for not doing better. Tonight, my sister reminded me that God will clear my thoughts for what I need to work on. Oh. So, back to The Project. I want this re-write done by the end of the month. If I'm truly going to place my life in God's hands, then I really need to pay attention to what He's telling me. I'm working on it. This is why God gives us a support system, or another way of saying it: His children, just like me, that I may call siblings or friends, but His children. And as they help me, I pray I help them.

A break and now back at it...

There are days when I wonder what I'm thinking. And yet, every time I ask God what next... Today, I asked for more work. I need the pay. I was given a little, but not much. Better than nothing. I did not bemoan my almost jobless state. I printed out the next two chapters and went to work on editing and re-writing. All is in God's hands.

You know you're a writer when...

... you can't stay away from writing, no matter how tired you are, or how uninspired you feel. I've tweaked the first chapter and re-written the first half of the second chapter of the current WIP. Whether or not I'm a saleable writer is yet to be determined.

Happy St. Patrick's Day...

This year, I learned that St. Patrick's Day is not a drinking holiday. It is, in fact, a religious feast day. Cool. I had PTBW, today. Thanks, DrR! To celebrate the re-write of the project, my sister gave me a new lavender plant. My last one wasn't doing well. It was also several years old. I hadn't cared for it as I ought to have done. The last one had full sun during the heat of summer and full shade during the chill of winter. I'll do better with the new one. I've learned a lot about the proper care of lavender. It smells wonderful. I put it in a pot that I intended to move around a bit until I find a spot that suits it. I also did a re-write of chapter one of the current WIP. I'm much happier with it. I finished reading Stephanie Newton's Point Blank Protector, of the Emerald Coast 911 series, which take place in Florida. It's a Harlequin Love Inspired Suspense. She was one of the first writers that I made a conscious effort to read because she was a debut writer. She's now on my must-read list. What I like about series is the opportunity to re-visit old friends from previous books, seeing how their lives are coming along. There was also an added treat with a quick trip to Sedona, Arizona. She had some intriguing concepts in her story. I recommend the whole series.

Busy day...

It's started about six o'clock this morning. I've been working on the re-write of the project, and today I worked all the way through it, to the end. It's now 10:30 at night. My arms hurt. My legs hurt. My back burns. I feel GREAT! LOL! This is a remarkable experience.

The wonder of friends...

There is something amazing about being able to chat with a friend about your characters and plot and know that they understand. What a precious gift to have them ask the right questions that reveal answers you didn't know where waiting to be found. One book is consigned to the document folder. In it's place is a new book. I'll use some of the old story, but most will be rewritten. I'm much happier with the new plot turns and the added depth to the characters. It isn't easy killing your darlings, but sometimes it's for the best in order to unlock a richer tale.

Do Not Forget to Breathe...

I had one of my manuscripts critiqued. It was very encouraging, and wonderfully precise in what I needed to change and improve. I'm still debating if I want to use my real name or my pseudo for publishing. Not really important, at this time; something else to think about besides the work ahead of me. I'm doing another re-write, changing plots, names, goals... it's barely the same story I started out with, and I mean barely! The original had some great ideas, but I had so much yet to learn. Now, I'm using what I learned. I've discovered that I need an outline when I write. I need to know where I'm going. Is it balanced? What will be the darkest moment? What, precisely, are their goals, separately and together? I've also discovered that this basic stuff has to be done by hand. But when I start actually writing scenes, it needs to be in the computer. I could easily be overwhelmed. Consider this: My PTBW (which doesn't actually pay-the-bills anymore, but something is better than nothing) didn't have anything for me, today. What this meant to me: I've had all day to work on the advice I was given, and did. Life is an adventure.

God incident... in today's quotes...

We should be taught not to wait for inspiration to start a thing. Action always generates inspiration. Inspiration seldom generates action. - Frank Tibolt

Yesterday, I started back in on The Project. I didn't feel inspired. Today, I started the in depth re-write, chapter by chapter. Today is chapter one. It is soooo much better!

The brain is back...

I worked on The Project, but it was a bit of a struggle. It's feeling forced and awkward. I did some re-writing of the first chapter. Maybe it would help if I only worked on one chapter at a time. The book truly is helping me make some amazing changes. I want to share it.

Exploring...

I'm taking a week to explore my hopes and dreams. It's turning into a fascinating exercise. I did a bit of writing, adding material. Interestingly enough, in some of the visualizing/envisioning myself, I didn't use my real name. I used this one. Something to think about.

Okay, God, now what, again...

It's official: I've been laid off by my main client. The new health care regulations made my job obsolete. Blessedly, I still have one client, though it isn't a huge income. I'm dipping into savings, but less deeply. It isn't as if I haven't been here before, on numerous occasions, actually. You never really become accustomed to it. It's a step into the dark, and saying, "God, I trust you to watch over me, and whatever happens, I know you will not abandon me. I know a part of me wants it to be easy because that's less scary, but I also trust you to lift me up and strengthen me and do what's best. Thank you for letting me pray my every worry and concern, and knowing that though I might not sound like it, in my heart, I want your way more than I want mine."